Toddler

So it has officially been 2 full weeks since Addie has nursed and I can officially say we are DONE!

So bittersweet! Its so nice to have that freedom! Daddy can put her to bed now, as she doesn't need to nurse to go to sleep, and it is SO NICE to have my body back! That was like 2 years of my body being used as a main source of nutrients to a growing person and I'm kinda done with that..for now. 

But it has been a little sad too, especially at 3 am when she wakes up and only wants me, or when she pulls at my shirt asking for it. But that has slowly faded...away and I am so surprised at the independent little toddler that is left. 

Nursing is/was so amazing to me. That was one thing that surprised me about having a baby. Its like from conception that growing baby is completely reliant on you for all their nutritional needs and life sustaining things. Then slowly it grows and grows and you become so in love with that little one growing inside you that, even though you want them out it pains you because they won't need you so much anymore. They can breath, and move on their own, and eat. I remember when I had Addie, I could feel her spirit leave me as she was born and though I was so excited (and soo soo ready to be done) I felt a twinge of sadness feeling my baby leave me, to enter the world. A world where they aren't protected by you from every harm or sickness, and they have to be able to breath, eat, and move on their own now. And not only that, but they can't be with you every second anymore because they aren't a part of you.

 But then Heavenly Father has blessed women with the wonderful, beautiful capacity to nurse their infants.  So even after that child has left your body and the protection, comfort and nourishment it provides, you still have that capacity to nourish them.  Breastfeeding was always a breeze for me, granted their were some rough nights and the first 2 weeks hurt like no other, but it came so easy for the both  of and was really amazing. Sometimes, especially when she or I were sad, nursing just made us feel better. Its just a connection that only you can have with that child and it really is an amazing gift. 

Anyway enough with my rant. I am just really grateful that I was able to give my baby girl 14 full months of breastfeeding because in so many ways it was amazing! I know its not right now everyone and it certainly is not easy but for me it was so so worth it! 

I am so to have this cute little toddler to call mine! I love her to pieces!